slow heal

these past couple of weeks have been unbelievably difficult.  the pain & grief were & still are UNREAL.  the sudden absences of our loved ones are starting to sink in…& i’m afraid it’s going to be a slow heal.

i wanted to thank you all again for all the wonderfully kind & comforting words, thoughts and prayers.  please know that we very much appreciate them.  i especially wanted to thank my sister jo & her husband tim for taking care of us (i.e., sharing their beautiful home with us, feeding not only us, but the many friends & family members —& there were a lot of them!—that we have seen over the past couple of weeks & for being there for us).  we couldn’t have gotten thru all this without their love, compassion and support.   

we’ve got one more hurdle to go…the private burial service we’re having for my bil this saturday.  it’s been helpful to have been around as many family members and friends during this very stressful time.   i cannot even begin to explain the extreme sadness we’ve been feeling these days.  i’ve never quite experienced this before.  & i am afraid that this won’t be the last time either…

haven’t been doing much work in the studio.  things kinda took a backseat when stuff started to hit the fan.  i had a couple of works in progress when we first got the news about dad…then when i was up to it, i worked on my art wips a little a time, in between bouts of tears.

it’s been hard lately to write something cheerful these days because i’ve been so overwhelmed with grief.  but i think i need to force myself to get back into my art-making.  a friend mentioned that perhaps my art can be like therapy?  i think that might be a good idea (thanks pamela for the suggestion!). 

so here are some little things i’ve worked on:

rlseptatcs1_edited-1 

these are for red lead’s september atc swap.  the theme was, what red lead image are you?  i was in the middle of making these when we learned that dad had fallen & broken his hip…anyway, i finally finished them.  i used a set of rubber stamps that i had bought a few years ago from red lead.   & just cut out copies of my baby pix.   it’s kind of a dark-ish palette than i am used to using, but i wanted to use the papers & embellishments that i already had in my personal stash.

rlseptatcs3

when i made these atcs, i didn’t know that the text i assembled here would hold so much weight for me now:

never forget…today’s joys

what matters most…today’s joys

loving life…today’s joys

then i made these because i had a conversation with my little niece & nephew a few days ago about dying & how they believed that people became angels in heaven.  i saw that lorri’s september atc theme was angels, so i started to think of something…here’s what came up:

coping1

cherish the memories…especially the happy times with loved ones.

coping2

have courage to survive through the pain & heartache & most of all,

 to carry on.

coping3

have hope, comfort & peace that time will heal our grief & that memories will live on in our hearts.

i realized after i made these that i couldn’t part with them…so back to the drawing board & made these for lorri’s swap instead.

angelatcs1

here are a couple of close ups:

angelsatcs2

angelsatcs3

this is the most that i’ve shared/written since everything happened two weeks ago.  i’ve not had much energy or desire these days.  each day has been a struggle, but both the dh & i  are hanging in there.  we’ve got one more final goodbye to do for my bil. 

so please bear with me/us as i/we try to get through the next couple of days. 

as always, thanks for stopping by.

xo mary ann & joe

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One Response

  1. Wow, Mary ann, I just went back to read about your losses. I’m so sorry. I will be praying for comfort for you and your family… Your artwork is lovely and full of real, deep sentiments. xoxo.

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